The SF massage parlor scene is usually frustrating: average looking girls aggressively seeking over generous tips. Part of this adventure was my fault, I spent the evening drinking a few beers and walked into this place (they are open until 4 AM) instead of going back to my hotel. Buzzed in and walked down into cellar. Greeted by short, squatty chick who may have been Thai. She was not great looking and had large moles on her back and face. But she brought me a nice cup of hot tea. She gave lame massage and asked if I wanted full service. Hey...I didn't come in here for the tea. Her English was good--too good--she talked a lot and was kinda a hustler. Wanted tip first and I handed a benjamin...she wanted $200 and I tried to calmly explain that only really HOT girls get that kind of money. Gee, maybe the beer limited my diplomatic skills because she didn't quite understand that she wasn't hot: she had a friggin' beer belly for god's sake! I put my hand back on the bill and said fine, if you don't want the deal than I'll take back the money and leave. We literally tugged back and forth on the bill for about 30 seconds..finally she pulled it away and insisted she would make me happy. Came back in and started a nude cbj. I don't know if it was the drink, or the fact she was a little fuggly, or the fact that I was still pissed about the negotiations, or the fact that I'd already wacked off earlier, but I just could'nt get too excited. I suggested some oil and a tug job and she complied. Finally I just laughed and admitted that this wasn't going to work. She brought me another hot tea and I stumbled out the door. A fool and his money are soon parted. This was all a dream of course, I hope.