Pro vs Non-pro sex

[MPkid]

Originally Posted by Sore_Loin

Good points needasianspinner. But he suggested -mentioned- several times that he is not a good looking guy.

Yes personality can overcome this, if you have or can cultivate a natural spark. But obsession over your own looks (because the world tells you people are obsessed with looks) can make it so much harder to be confident and playful, so you have to handicap that. He is intelligent, but the main problem is that through years of reinforcement he EXPECTS a negative result. He is longing for something, but expecting to be disappointed, unconsciously making it happen. He can fool himself for a little while but he knows how each script will end. Deep pattern. He has summed it up for us, this "always" happens.

But this is going on all over the lovelorn world. So many give up and stop trying, or, adjust the approach and find new ways of being happy (mongering is just one example). But if he still wants a non-pro relationship, he needs to understand that basically people like light, mysterious light that asks for nothing in return, instead of predictable or even sensible darkness, no matter what; forget getting the girl or getting something back, just give HER joy, be capricious and move - to the opposite of needy.
So, don't be … Obsessive! And back to needasianspinner's point: are we asking of him not to be himself? There are even ugly people who still ooze charisma. Can it be learned? Probably a bit, but not like a subject, a set of rules. It is a way. MPKid shed a lot of light on this, and in his case, he applied himself, got momentum and his confidence grew hand in hand with EXPECTING a better outcome, or not caring so much. He fell back in love with himself in a way. And this is what the girls pick up on.

Wow. I'm not even high.

Good Luck Obsessive. Don't take life so seriously, you are just a player upon a stage. Tell yourself a different story every night.

You hit the nail on the head. Once you learn this stuff you will not care what the girl thinks or more so you don't put as much stock into any ONE girl. If I try to pick up a girl or start a conversation with a girl that I might like and she blows me off I don't care even a little bit and I don't take it personally that something is wrong with me. I know what i have to offer and if I'm not her type or she doesn't see it I could care less....fuck her and on to the next. Its a numbers game...plain and simple. My buddy called it the 37 rule. He wasn't a good looking guy or even a charmer but he said if you have the balls to walk up to a girl and ask her to go to bed with you most will not....but he said he never asked more than 37 before one said OK. LOL

[kewlBraad]

Obsessive,

I think the reason you are getting so much advice on this thread is because you started a thread a few months ago asking (or at least pondering) the question "how can I get the hot American looking women I want without having to pay for it?" Or some sort...

Bottom line...women ask why we can't be attracted to them without them looking hot and sexy. For us, we are attracted (initially) to what we see. Women want to feel secure and safe. Money offers that to them. If you have money, make it work to your advantage. Not in a "hey I'll pay you to have sex with me" way, but in a traditional find the woman you like, pursue her and make her feel secure and safe because you can provide for her way.

Of course this means you are going to have to look for women that aren't just looking for a "good time." You're going to have to find a good looking, but stable and down to earth lady. Not easy, but that is life. How you do that, and what you do when you find her is up to you.

Originally Posted by Obsessive

I'm not trying to get help or advice from you guys. I was just sharing because the discussion seemed relatable to me. To the guys who then jumped in to give advice, it's appreciated but my experience is not what you may think. I know about the stuff that's supposed to help in normal dating but I never got it to work for me. If I ever did, I wouldn't be here. It makes me wonder about MPKid - if he got normal dating to work for him to his satisfaction, why is he mongering? The only reason i can think of for any guy to monger who otherwise has access to women is because he's married and wanting variety or he's not getting the kind of women he wants.

I'm being honest. I'm not throwing bull around like somehow I'm getting the kind of women I want but inexplicably still here. I'm here because I can't get the kind of women I want but at least I found a way to rent them. It's a downer because the money is so insignificant sometimes I wonder why they wouldn't just be into me any other way?

I don't disagree about American women. Most are counts and the few good ones remaining are being brainwashed these days by extreme feminist thinking. The problem is I tend to only find American women attractive. Not purely just American. What I mean is Western-looking white or American-Asian. Pale Latinas. White, Spanish or Italian European. German. Swiss. I don't like their Western personalities but I like their Western look. Where can I find that look but not the attitude? Where can I find women who can care for a guy based on his mind and personality and not his looks or wallet? I don't mind if a woman might originally pay attention to me because of money but I don't want to feel like I have to pay for her time or attention.

[Chogori]

Originally Posted by Obsessive

Where can I find women who can care for a guy based on his mind and personality and not his looks or wallet? I don't mind if a woman might originally pay attention to me because of money but I don't want to feel like I have to pay for her time or attention.

You want a woman who cares for mind and personality yet you seem to base what you want in a woman on having a certain look. You are attracted to a certain look in a woman. Double standard?

[needasianspinner]

Chogori, I agree. He wants a woman who is not superficial or greedy. But this woman has to be white, good looking, and have a nice body. That is a double standard.

He is also thinking that his mind and personality are so impressive, that they compensate for other shortcomings. If this was true, I think he would have found plenty of long-term relationships by now.

I can't speak for everyone here, but it does seem like most guys here are looking for a little variety on the side. Most guys here have current girlfriends, ex-girlfriends, wives, divorced wives, etc. They don't have problems with finding meaningful connections and real relationships with women. Their problem is keeping these relationships healthy and interesting. Obsessive's problem is finding a woman who meets his standards and wants him to be her man.

[asiansam]

Originally Posted by needasianspinner

Chogori, I agree. He wants a woman who is not superficial or greedy. But this woman has to be white, good looking, and have a nice body. That is a double standard. ...

More like an impossible combination!

[MPkid]

Originally Posted by asiansam

More like an impossible combination!

I agree....my experience is America is fresh out of single, non-greedy, good looking, white girls with good bodies that aren't cunts. Best you can hope for is to maybe get two out of 5 of these traits. If she's single and good looking she probably will be chubby and not white...if she's good looking and white you can bet she'll be a greedy cunt and not single...you get my point.
However, Eastern Europe is still chuck full of them

[mumford75]

Originally Posted by MPkid

I agree....my experience is America is fresh out of single, non-greedy, good looking, white girls with good bodies that aren't cunts. Best you can hope for is to maybe get two out of 5 of these traits. If she's single and good looking she probably will be chubby and not white...if she's good looking and white you can bet she'll be a greedy cunt and not single...you get my point.
However, Eastern Europe is still chuck full of them

Keep looking for young ones with hot bodies and gods-gift attitudes and you get greedy girls and heart burn. If you have a few years, a few dollars, and a decent attitude you can find plenty of 35 yo-plus women who enjoy a good lay as much -or more- than you do.... and appreciate your effort.

[chanceforester]

[quote=MPkid;69556]I agree..... If she's single and good looking she probably will be chubby and not white...

I'm good with that...actually chubby has become something of a fetish for me...yes...I'm a chubby chaser!

[MPkid]

[quote=chanceforester;69605]

Originally Posted by MPkid

I agree..... If she's single and good looking she probably will be chubby and not white...

I'm good with that...actually chubby has become something of a fetish for me...yes...I'm a chubby chaser!

There are always exceptions to every rule...that is why Baskin Robbins has 31 flavors! LOL

[southOC]

On January 2, 2014 I had sex with a former girlfriend who is Mexican American and about 15 years younger than me. She is a civilian. As I have stated, I generally only have sexual relations with prostitutes. However, I recently had every test known to man and I came out clean.

Since we broke up she has gained at least 20 pounds and she was sorta fat to start with. She has sloppy titties and a gut that makes her look 6 months pregnant. She also has a full bush.

Oh, and she also is now married to a big Mexican American guy who is at least 20 years younger than me, five inches taller and outweighs me by 40 pounds. Perhaps that added to excitement.

We always had great sex in the past- that was never our problem. Anyway, she went nuts while we were doing it- begging me to give her a baby, etc. It was a hot as it gets. She has been texting me nonstop about getting together again.

I don't have to worry about her husband kicking my ass. If he finds out he will flat out kill me. He is a big San Francisco 49er fan and in a couple of hours he will go to a bar in San Clemente and watch the game. During that time, I will fuck his bride again. Hopefully, I will live long enough to provide an update.