Pro vs Non-pro sex
 

So, I've been mongering for almost ten years now. Many of my experiences in this hobby are very similar to those I have read from all of you. A few years ago, I finally scored a non-pro Craigslist "Casual Encounter" hook up with a sweet lady (fine slim body with a nice little ass & tits, think Natalie Portman). She had a regular job, was in her late 20's and lived alone in her own apartment. From time to time she would email me and I would go over late at night and we'd have wonderful sex for hours. She would fall asleep and I would kiss her on the cheek, quietly get dressed and slip out her front door, locking it behind me. Not only was she rare in that she was actually a real woman on Craigslist, but she also was great in bed and really cool. Under different circumstances I could have seen myself becoming involved with her emotionally and more. After 2 or 3 years of hooking up 10 to 15 times with her, she found a significant other and I moved on. Back to purely mongering. Fast forward to this past weekend. As I am sure most of you know, Craigslist is a desolate waste ground of spammers and scammers. The odds of actually hooking up on there ever again are probably 1,000 to 1 or worse. Well, last weekend I did. Mid 30's stunningly beautiful NSA "Casual Encounter." I was trolling all the listings and sending out replies, hoping to find another lady like the one I had before. - Let me take a moment and explain why I still look for something "non-pro," even though it is so much work and very difficult to achieve on-line. One hour is just not enough time to have some nice enjoyable foreplay, oral, touching and multi-position sex. And, I like taking my time before and after. Talking a bit, warming each other up, etc. If I were a rich man I would definitely do over-night GFE escorts. - Back to this stunner from last weekend. So, she told me in her emails that she wanted to be very discreet. I was like, cool, I'm down for that, too. She named the Starbucks we would meet at to see if there was chemistry. I went there and stood in line (had not traded pics with her yet, so did not know what she looked like). We scheduled to meet there at 2pm. Waiting for my order I would glance at different ladies in line and try to figure out which one she was. We agreed once we got there we would email to each other where were sitting. I liked that, in case "she" was a 250 lb CD or something. That way I could slip out and not look back. Hmmmm, is it the pudgy Thai looking chick that keeps looking my way, as she waits to order her Frapa-whatever? And I am waiting at the pick up counter for my iced tea. Or, maybe that sorta-kinky looking goth chick with the extra piercings??? Nope, her bf just walked in. Yep, my luck, it's gotta be the overweight almost 40's looking, dumpy white lady. She gonna turn me every-which-way but loose. Well, it's a release I need, and maybe she'll have some great oral skills to make up for the looks. Nope, they all came and went (no pun). At 2:15 still no email, so I took my iced tea out to my car and figured I would check my email on my laptop, rather than my phone, just in case. Nada. Then, on a fluke I checked my spam folder. We all know that will be full from my couple of hours of searching the CE section, and all the spammers replying back. Hmmm, what's this? A craigslist email address reply in my spam. I open it...it's her! My Starbucks hook up has written twice. "I'm here. I'm in my car, should I come in?" Next one, "Are you here? I'm going to walk up to Starbucks. I am wearing a blue sun dress, if you like me, come out." I was like, right....someone playing some real funny shit on me....probably some teenage punk kids up in their apartment sending twenty guys to their local Starbucks and writing them when they see a....WAIT! I see a 30's something nice looking hottie walking up to the Starbucks in a blue sun dress. I'm still in my car. Okay, do I play into these punk teens ploy and walk up to her? I get out of my car and walk casually towards the Starbucks as she goes inside. No way this could be a chick that is on Craigslist looking for stranger sex, she's way too hot for that, I tell myself. Has to be a set-up. I sit down at a table outside and watch as she orders, picks up her drink then heads back to her car. I get up as "nonchalantly" as I can, follow about 20 feet behind her. Just before stepping off the sidewalk into the parking lot, she stops and turns... Alright, this thread is getting really long. I will finish it if you guys want me to....but my main point here is how much easier it is to just go get a nice sweet AMP girl for an hour or so. What you guys think?

PART TWO. I re-read the first part and realized at least a couple of you guys will hunt me down and take my computer away until I finish the story.....sorry it is so long and takes two parts - maybe a bit cathartic or something for me. I do find it somewhat interesting to relive it this way, by writing it out. Anyway, so there was this one guy sitting at one of tables at the Starbucks, he looked at my blue sundress sweetheart, like he was expecting her, as well. Then he noticed me closing in on her as she walked by him and he looked back down at his book or computer or whatever he was doing. She stopped before stepping down off the sidewalk, and did this slow turn, like in a movie or something, time sort of stood still. We made eye contact, and I knew, this was for real. She is my CL NSA casual encounter. "Hi, I'm Brad." She smiled and looked relieved. She also looked 20's, innocent and smelled nice. You could tell she had just taken a shower and gotten dressed for the "special" occasion. We stood there a minute or so and chatted. Then decided to use my car to go to a hotel. It was natural and pretty easy. She wasn't freaked out, or weird. At the hotel I took my time and let her feel comfortable. We had sex, kissed like boyfriend & girlfriend and it was good. Now, here's the catch. After me spending a good amount of DIY time on her, she pushed me back and said I need you in me. Then she just slipped me in. BB : o If I were at an AMP I would have been like "Whoa! Let's put something on that little guy first." But, I wasn't and she was a non-pro so I thought why not. She was wanting it and it felt good. After a few minutes of some really great unprotected smooth and slippery sex, she asked, "You're healthy, right?" I told her I never have sex without a condom and I have one in my pants pocket right over there. I think that reminded her of the realities. We slipped on the cover and went back at it. Okay, here's the deal. Both this stunner and my Natalie look-alike weren't that great at sex. They both had orgasms, which is arousing for myself and them, but they didn't really do oral that great. They definitely didn't know how to tease. Play with my boys....nope. The best sex I have ever had has been with Asian providers - Korean in particular. Occasional intimacy from them, but the pros seem to give the sex and nons (sometimes) the intimacy. What's your experience been?

I don't remember civvies.....The Koreans have been the best pros for me as well, even if the Thais are warmer, they're not as adventurous. A Chinese or two, perhaps...
nice story, Brad, you write well.

Civvies, I like that....probably a better term, for sure here on monger haven. Don't know if I write well, but I definitely wrote looooong just now, which is a sign of not writing well, actually. Thanks

Whenever I am with a non-pro it reminds me of my exwife and she was terrible in bed....I want a women who knows how to finish a man off and wont stop until her job is done. I had an interesting time with a HJ girl this week...I think she had a condom in her back pocket but we didnt use it and I'm still not sure if she is a pro or a non-pro but im gonna keep seeing her until I am sure of the answer...

Boo... I think you have realized the best time is with from some girl, lady, or woman, whatever, that enjoys spontaneous and exciting times just like you do. And yes it is worth the trouble... Me, after too many cheap AMPs and overpriced private sessions I have moved on to find women in their late 30s or 40s who enjoy a discrete time as much as I do... and sometimes we even have a conversation... I don't care if they are non-pros next door or pros just that they take care of me if I take care of them. None of this "are you finished yet?", "don't touch me" or "that will cost you more!".

hmmm....i don't know where to start. but i can make it short. i feel you on the same way. i don't like to got to those pro mp, escort, etc that the girls fs day and night, 7days a week, and 365 days a year. and it's hard to find casual encounter nowaday, ended up they are escort post in casual encounter. i tend to go to liget mp or hj mp. and as you know them better, they will go all the way, most of the time is BB. you get my point..

I agree with DoMe, I like getting a Legit or HJ girl to go for more. I guess you would say I like the Non-Pro-Pro. Yes, they are usually BB. Sure there are some of you getting the same service from them but it's not like the high mileage providers.

So, Kewlbrad, you have had two positive experiences from CL in 10 years? How many hours of searching and how many rip-offs did you endure? This is why I have given up on CL and even Backpage. I don't want a box of chocolates half of them cream-filled, some white chocolate, some choc-covered cherries (make me puke), and maybe one or two great truffle-like pieces which are first-come first-serve and you will be very lucky to be the first. That is why I prefer the homogeneous packaging of an AMP where you know what you will get at a minimum and if you want more you are more than likely to get it and you can read these very helpful reviews if you want to be sure. (You really can't achieve sexual satisfaction in an hour? You might think about getting a real girlfriend.)

Kewlbrad, glad it's paying off for you. I'm in the camp with HomoE, I've browsed the CL and SD sites, but don't want to make the investment in time and energy to sift through all the BS and find the few gems that are out there. Good story, thanks for sharing.

Great responses that make me think and realize a couple of things. @memc - yep, that is what is occurring to me...I like the pursuit of finding that one in a thousand spontaneous hook-up. @homoE - you too are correct, waaaaay too many hours for a couple of hook ups...I've had a few others over the years, but none worth mentioning or even remembering. @hugh, dome & mp - I never thought to try and turn the hj or legit girl . . . great challenge. Might just sorta-kinda be the best of both worlds...like mp wrote, the Non-Pro-Pro. And, homoE I can get sexual satisfaction in a 30 minute session. Sometimes those are the best mp's, right? I just can't do a 2-pop in under a couple of hours.

Time is money and money is time...dont waste either one or you are gonna have blue balls. There is more than one way to enjoy the hobby but you cant enjoy it if you stay home and jerk off

You have a better chance of picking up a random encounter at the supermarket than you do on Craigslist! WOW...the things we will do for pussy!! LOL

MPkid, I'm in my 50's and have never really had, to my recall, a random encounter whilst out and about. Not part of my experience. I do remember one late night - maybe 1am - in a CVS, there was a large number of lonely looking ladies shopping there. More than one looked my way and smiled. I would smile back...it sort of felt like it might have been a "stranger sex" opportunity. But, I'm just not sure how to instigate in those random public situations. lol

Kewlbrad - thanks for sharing your experiences. I related to your story, as I took a hiatus the last year from mongering and have tried the non-Pro route. My results have been as follows through CL and AFF. Numerous nights out drinking, time and money spent on finding a FWB. CL has been 1 out of 10 hit, but I did hit the jackpot with one there. She is a married Asian that is looking for more and we see each other 1-2x per week. My experience with her has been as good as with a provider, just that each session is 2-4 hours vs. 1. Not sure how long this will last, but I will continue to get while the going is good. Was it worth all the investment, with this one, YES.

The AsianFF site has netted over the past year 8 different women I have gone out with. Hard to put a batting avg. on 8 out of xx, but will say it is probably more in the 20% response range. Better than CL, but still not great. Out of the 8 I did see, I slept with 4, and only 1 was good in bed. The others had just average skills and one admitted to me she had only slept with one other guy in her life. The one that was good, we were compatible in bed, but not so much otherwise. A common thread on that site is many women are looking for a husband or green card. I will say, I am married and told them this up front. Some wouldn't go there, but a few continued to see me. I will say 2 girls were pretty DDG. The AsianFF site can get you some good leads, but you will still need to make an investment.

My last avenue has been to get a provider to start seeing me on the side. This has been the most time consuming and probably least productive effort. First, many of these girls are pretty jaded about men. If you had to f*^K a bunch of strange dicks all day, you would be too. Second, from a health perspective, I like eating pu$$y, but not one that is getting that much action. Last, they seem to be under control and watch of their organization. Dating their clients is frowned upon. I will say I have gotten 4 numbers and none of them have gone anywhere, or the girl moved to another city right after.

My conclusion of my experiment is that I will continue to pursue longer term non-Pro's on the side. I have one great primary and a backup that just came back from Taiwan. I am starting to look for a third in case the first two fall through since nothing lasts forever. The Pro's are still needed. Sometimes the one's I am seeing are not available, on their period, or I am looking for something different. They are there, ready willing and able at a moments notice which is always nice.

h14 - sounds like you been making the non-pro thing work really well for sure. I tried Ashley Madison for like a week and it just seemed like another scam site...I'm sure there is something there, but a bit timid about hooking up with another guys lady. The female species isn't that discreet at times, worse yet, might even try to use one of us to get back at their cheating or unloving man. Where would that leave me? Maybe at the wrong end of some really pissed off dude I'm thinking. Years ago I tried AFF but that was early on when camgirls were just getting started and they were posing as interested FWB's. You think I should give it another shot? Thanks!

Interesting. I have had some limited success with AFF and Yahoo Personals (back in the day of free ads), but the bottom line for me is, TOO MUCH WORK! And too much time to invest. I'm married, and these chicks always want more of my time than I can give them. I have to plan and ration my time with "other women," so it doesn't work so well for me. Plus there's all that time spent finding, chatting up and weeding out the girls on those sites. Providers fit my lifestyle better, and "turning" a legit or HJ girl into something more is the most I'm willing to try for these days.

And too much money. I'm married too. Pickups are too dangerous since work doesn't take me far from the home front. A pro isn't going to rat me out. Shit, can't someone just give me their leftovers?! My ATFs been gone again, someone needs to tell her we have needs that need to be met. WTF is wrong with her!!

Years ago I tried AFF but that was early on when camgirls were just getting started and they were posing as interested FWB's. You think I should give it another shot? Thanks![/quote]

Brad - AFF is probably worth another shot if you want another source of prospects. I typically try to weed out who I won't pursue online through emails, pictures and chat. This has reduced the amount of time wasted actually going out on "dates". I don't have a lot of free time either, so accomplish this at night. Happy hunting.

My first wife was a chinese x ray tech when I met her. She was a super slut in bed. She would do anything. Deep french kiss, rim job, BBBJ like porno movie, anal, cum in mouth cum on face, let me eat her ass. Whatever I wanted. The only problem? We used to have bad fights.

My second wife is a Korean pro. While she is hot and I do like to fuck her she is much more reserved. She does not like to french kiss [first wife was very into it] I know my breath is good and my teeth are good [regular trips to the dentist] She is kind of lazy when i fuck her, Always the same thing usually. I eat her, she cums, I fuck her mish then doggy. I cum. Repeat ad infinium. But we don't fight. Go figure?

I can't imagine wanting to have a long term relationship with a non prostitute unless she is a bar slut. I have had a few longer term relationships with girls who will jump into bed with anyone as long as they are either drunk or tweaking. I vastly prefer knowing my girl is an experienced pro, capable of servicing a minimum of 10 to 15 men per day.

Craigslist is really easy to score if u know what you are doing. So have you met up since the Starbucks encounter? Was she asian?

Hey Mike9275,

Starbucks girl is Latina....I have not met back up with her, yet. So, you up to messaging me your inside line for success on CL? : )

Ichi, you always got a great twist on everything! So, from your experience, the non-pro is more wild and crazy. lol Charlie Sheen told the Judge (when he was facing charges for using the services of prostitutes - Heidi Fleiss era) "I don't pay them for sex, I pay them to leave."

I don't think he was ever up on charges related to prostitution. You can't get busted for being in a madam's "client book." I'm not sure he was ever even subpoenaed as a witness in that cunt's trial. At most it was a momentary "scandal" in the tabloids, and a memorable quote for posterity.

AsianSam, I can't recall what all the details were, but for whatever reason, Sheen did give a "Video Testimony" that helped convict Fleiss: July 20, 1995 - His videotaped testimony is shown at Fleiss's tax evasion trial; explains the number of times he used her services, at least 27, and the amount of money he spent, $1,500 - $3,000/visit. He is granted limited immunity from prosecution for solicitation in exchange for his testimony. http://www.cnn.com/2013/09/11/showbi...en-fast-facts/

He probably shared your lack of love for Ms. Heidi "C" Fleiss. LoL

Sure send me an IM and maybe we can trade info. Ill say its not about scouring the ads it's just the opposite that has gotten me results...

I stand corrected. It's been a while since the Heidi Fleiss thing. Still, while my limited web-surfing just now did reveal a "limited immunity from prosecution" in exchange for his testimony, I'm not sure what that immunity covered. Solicitation of a prostitute is a minor chickenshit misdemeanor. With very few exceptions (solicitation not among them), a misdemeanor arrest cannot occur unless the offense was committed in the arresting officer's (or arresting private person's) presence. So what was Charlie afraid of? Besides, it was Heidi Fleiss' federal tax evasion trial he was testifying for (to show she was pulling down big bucks). What do the Feds have to do with enforcing local misdemeanors? Since Charlie stays in trouble, it might have been something else he was trying to wiggle out of, or perhaps he got involved in some sort of "bringing a prostitute over state lines" bullshit. I think there is more to it than presented here.

Charlie was under probation for something else at the time....and, I believe the judge (if memory serves me) wanted to make an example of him.

It was drugs I think. Charlie got busted for drugs before.

I IM'd you....

Yeah, that's interesting. My second wife couldn't suck dick for nothing, but she was very sexy in the rack; my third was like a leech, no facial, but she wasn't satisfied until she had drained me. First wife died. Second wife left me, third wife was a mean drunk. That's when I started the hobby in 2005.

Since then I have "dated" (sometimes seriously) various pros. A Chinese gal, a couple Viet, and a Latina. At the shop, they were amazing, but at home not so exciting. I guess it's because they view the act at the shop as something they have to do, but at home it's not a show - or at least that's my take on it. Ichi I remember you saying something about compartmentalizing before. I always try to give them a BFE like a lover....so yeah, it got down to making them come with mouth and trying to get them to come Mish or CG, then blasting away watching the ass from behind...I dunno. Most of the girls I've seen outside the shop were my age, late forties early fifties...I guess I just didn't want to stay with them and watch them become Coco or Lily or Shirley....

Whoa! Du-ude, that's a buzz killer right there.

Shirley is not that bad. Maybe not the premium top shelf bud but she's still smokable without many seeds. Oh wait, never mind, that chick has been filled with seeds.

I'm not talking about paying for it bro...I'm talking about dating or living with it. Yeah, Shirley is the best looking of the old providers, but she can't charge top dollar. Coco, by the way is one of the sweetest gals ever. And Lily is super cool. And I think she does have a husband and a house not too far away. I've never been there, but she brings in baskets of produce that is not purchased. My point is that I've broken off long term relationships with providers because they still want to provide; even though the older they get, the less they make. Eventually, BBBJ CIM BBFS Greek becomes available because that's the way to keep customers. Or like Linh or May they provide less service and less smile. Either way, bitterness creeps in and that's almost as bad as being married to an American girl. Didn't mean to kill your buzz young fella, but when you've been around the block a few times the buzz wears off. I was faithful to my first wife who died, and I was faithful to my second wife who cheated on me. My third wife was hotter than the other two but was prone to two bottles of wine each night. The intimacy wore off after a few years and I felt ugly; and the arguments were more than I could take. That's when I met my first provider who made me feel sexy again. A plump young Chinese girl from Mirage in Lake Forest named Ana (Chinese name Anh - which in Vietnamese means man...LOL). Sorry for the rambling. I just know that at my age, the providers that I could seriously date would have to provide more for less and that would bum my high more than anything. I'd rather know El Sancho estaba visitando mi novia cuando you estaba trabajando.

Fairly interesting internet article about "scoring" via craigslist - http://www.ranker.com/list/the-begin...ymouscl?page=1

When you say "non pro" do you mean truly NSA sex? Or is it still pay-for-play?

If pay-for-play but with a girl who is just UTR or just a regular girl who does this occasionally, I'm not sure the extra trouble is really that huge for the reward. I too have been at this for years but after the first couple of years I really just wanted to find normal everyday non-hooker girls to hook up with and since then that's the only kind of girls I meet except for an occasional stop by mostly legit AMPs with open minded girls.

After 8 years of searching and going for those kind of girls online, never once was I able to meet up with one without expectation of payment. Some didn't want very much. Some wanted a lot. Some I saw many times. Some I only saw once or twice. What I found was that it's not so tough as long as you offer something. There are so many girls out there who become very open minded when they know there is a little cash even if it's not much.

I'm not looking for porn star sex, I want a sweet girl I can talk to and not feel stressed or rushed with who sometimes and unpredictably also takes things a step beyond. What do I mean? As an example I got a cute girl to help me out a few weeks ago for something just slightly sexually oriented. The type who is hot and friendly but low on cash so will do off-the-wall stuff to get by for a short time. She texted me a week later to chat and see if I needed any more help and I joked that I was horny. She said she could help with that and we negotiated a bit and the next time she came over she gave me the best BJ I've had in years.

The problem I've always had isn't finding these kind of girls. They are plentiful and sometimes I wonder how girls so nice & hot would jump in bed with me fore barely $100. My problem is even after so many years I have trouble finding either a true NSA relationship or landing a girl who likes me enough to pursue me for dating. Makes me feel like I'm not worthy and I end up just drowning myself more into the UTR girls. I end up wanting to convert some of these girls into something NSA but it never happens. At best we stay platonic friends and I end up learning that what I did with them was extremely uncommon or rare for them, like they had a time in their life they just needed a little extra cash from one guy if they could find a nice one one without making themselves feel like a prostitute.

Are you talking Craigslist or dating websites? Chatting up girls in bars? Just curious, since you make it seem like a relatively easy alternative.

Craigslist and Backpage and a few minor alternates. Girls in bars and dating web sites are impossible for me. I'm not outgoing or daring enough to get attention in bars and I'm not good looking enough to make the cut on dating web sites.

I didn't mean to say it was easy. It's definitely easier to go to a parlor or call up an obvious hooker. But it's no so hard that the reward isn't worth it.

The down side is inconsistency. Sometimes when I want to meet someone new I could go a week of trying and not get any results. Other times when I give just a little effort I get more replies than I need and I try to see up to 3 girls in a single week in case one of them it works out with for more than a one time thing. It's all still pay-for-play so I'm not seducing them with anything special before we meet. I think it's just that I've done it for so long I know the process very well. I'll go periods where I drop it for a while and other times I over-do it. In the past year or so I met about 15 new girls, 5 of them I had sex with. The ones I do more with tend to come around more often. The ones that just oblige me with a HJ or BJ are usually shorter term.

Most of them don't care about or ask for covers. I never understood why other than maybe they're not really promiscuous (just need a bit of cash and won't just sleep with just anyone) and maybe I seem less promiscuous than I really am. Sometimes it takes a while to get far. Start with some non-sexual play where at least I cum before they leave, then next time more and the next time these cute girls are on top of me as if we'd been going out on normal dates for a while.

I guess it takes some patience, but some of them have been really worth it. I just wish I could have the same kind of attention from girls for normal dating or relationships. Some of them are so pretty, it makes me feel sad about myself at the same time as they are treating me so nicely for such little money. I think about why I can't get the same kind of girls interested in me without pay but being a normal boyfriend who would take care of them indirectly anyway with money. I think because I might be the kind of guy a girl would be ashamed to be known as being with me. All my good and positive values are in my head and heart, not on my face or body.

these are very honest and informative posts, Obsessive.
Thanks for being candid.