Well Fluckyeah,
you now have the monger curse. You can't forget her (for having a real place in your life) but you eventually must. I read your post and all the other comments so far and here is how I see it:
1. You went into a parlor to have a massage and a 'good time' being young and naive.
2. You met her in there and over time you were infatuated with her.
3. You realised that she was working in there for a living and over time you developed questions about the business and her part in it during the same time that you became infatuated with her. Happens to the best of them.
4. She, just like you, has to think about how to support herself and make a living.
5. You have been tipping her the same in the parlor all the time but didn't mention if you gave her the same 'tip' when you saw her out of the parlor. If you did she could have easily felt like you placed her in a catagory other than girlfriend.
6. Once you over time maintained the same sort of relationship with her with a tip that would just barely pay to go to the movies she probably felt you were not serious about her or were not BF material even if she was attracted to you.
7. Now that you know of her moving on to a FS place the reality is it is the same business and she may be giving it up or not, for many reasons.
8. The fact is you and she never made it a committed relationship and she's free to do whatever she wants. You're not supporting her, yes?
9. So since you don't really know if she's doing anybody else and wonder if you and she could ever make it, without regrets, the only way you'll ever know is to put it to her to get together and you'd support her, so she could get out of the biz. Then you'd have trust in her, no?
10. But if she says no, you have your answer and you'd have two choices: quit her or see her knowing it'll never be. But if she says Yes, then get together and live happily ever after, dropping the monger lifestyle but living the dream with the girl you care about.
11. We've probably all been there and I have a hunch how it may go, but the STARK REALITY is if she won't quit the BIZ you know what she IS...Good Luck.
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